“Discovering your sexuality can be a fragile process, especially for LGBT folks. And if you ask, they will let you know if they are comfortable discussing it or not. On the same note, Russo says never to assume anyone’s sexuality, relationship, or identity is any of your business. Bisexual people make choices about who to be with, just like everyone else.” “Dating, marrying, living with, etc., one sex over another doesn’t erase someone’s bisexuality. “Every relationship I have been in and will ever be in will be a bisexual relationship because I am bisexual,” she continues. As an example, we shouldn’t assume bisexual people will ‘end up’ one way or the other, says Amy Russo, a bisexual woman and a Bod圜ombat and BodyPump instructor at Les Mills Fitness in New Jersey. Unfortunately, those in the LGBTQ community are subject to many assumptions, many of which they have to correct daily. “If a colleague knows me and knows even vaguely what’s going on and they take five minutes to talk about my emotional state, I greatly appreciate their efforts to be aware.” Don’t make assumptions about anything. “’I may be having a bad day because I’m thinking about all the anti-trans legislation being passed around the country and how this may impact kids,” Ben Van Handel, Ph.D., the co-founder and CEO of Heraux, shares as an example. By having a pulse on current events, you can be a better source of support. And you should remember there any and all legislation that discriminates against these individuals could be scary, life-changing, and hurtful. To be an ally, you should be a constant consumer of news related to the LGBTQ community. “Then ask follow-up questions perhaps to get a fuller picture.” Do educate yourself about current LGBTQ issues. “If someone is taking the time to share with you something that is likely deeply personal, and often, a dialogue that is not always easy to put into words, focus on really trying to take the words in and comprehending them,” he suggests. But to be an effective listener, you need to really hear what they are saying - and not merely wait for your return to reply.
![ally gay pride miami beach ally gay pride miami beach](https://hotspotsmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/3313_Miss-Miami-Beach-Gay-Pride.jpg)
This means practicing the old rule of ‘you have two ears and one mouth, so you should listen twice as much as you speak’. Your unconditional and undivided presence is paramount, and if you’re looking to be an ally, you must be prepared to listen and be a sounding board, Barker says.
![ally gay pride miami beach ally gay pride miami beach](https://live.staticflickr.com/4003/4528358131_a38e2308f3_b.jpg)
The goal with empathy is to find common ground, even if only a common thread, rather than being trained to see our differences as something to divide us, he says. And, it motivates you to push against any inclination to marginalize or discriminate.Īs Barker shares, when he came out at the age of 19, those close to him who were not in the LGBTQ community themselves were likely challenged to think of their actions and how they may have impacted his journey. The simple act of putting empathy before anything else allows you to be an ally in the ways the community needs you to be. Having the ability to understand and share another person’s feelings could be the superpower that heals the world, says Zachary Barker, an account supervisor at Demonstrate. But what does it really take to be an ally? And what misses the mark? Here, we chatted with executives who identify as LGBTQ on the do’s and don’ts of being an ally: Do have empathy. Instead, to be a true ally to this underserved and misrepresented group of people, you should be an active ally year-round.
![ally gay pride miami beach ally gay pride miami beach](https://ichef.bbci.co.uk/news/976/cpsprodpb/A6D3/production/_123470724_indexparade.jpg)
Though Pride takes place during June, it’s not enough to display your rainbow-colored support once a year. Instead, you simply believe in the right of equality and inclusion for all - regardless of any other factors.
![ally gay pride miami beach ally gay pride miami beach](https://www.advocate.com/sites/default/files/2018/12/07/matthew.jpg)
Being an ally is a lot like being a friend, but you may or may not have an individual connection to the community you’re standing up for. You would go to the ends of the earth for them, support them in whatever way they need - and always have their back against all odds. When you think of your relationship with your best friend, it’s based on a nearly non-conditional type of love.